I’m not one to usually do monthly goals, more likely to write a week’s worth of to-do lists with too many tasks and just focus on a smaller timeframe. However, since reading Big Magic - I know I need to stop referencing book but I’m obsessed - I’ve been following the practise of ‘what interests you?’ when I hit a wall with my creativity.
As February came round, I was feeling a bit meh about what I would write, film, even photograph, so put pen to paper once again and tried to uncover what it was exactly that I wanted to talk about. Surprisingly, it wasn’t as beauty heavy as January had been, but it was more of a reflection of my feelings and thoughts.
I’m a very internal person, I keep my fears and worries to myself and find it hard to deal with problems so bottle a lot of it up and cry when it gets too much; I panic I annoy people, and I panic that I’m not doing enough, so when I addressed what I wanted to achieve in February it came from a place of uncertainty.
The reason I’ve called this post ‘Monthly Goals aka Why Posts Change’ is because I think we change a lot month to month, and sometimes we (myself) restrict ourselves to follow a certain pattern; the other day, I was considering a move back to one video a week, maybe even a week off, or just stopping all together because none of my ideas seemed interesting, but that wasn’t the problem - time - it was me. I was trying to make content from I place I no longer was, and it’s crazy how in a period of 4 weeks you can go from ‘let’s do make-up tutorials and talk about skincare’ to ‘I want to discuss fear, change, expanding as a person whilst also dabbling in beauty now and again when I feel like it’.
Even now, looking at a pre-written schedule of ideas I still struggle with how they may work, but I know once I let myself relax into talking to myself about what I want to produce, the ideas will come. But what does February hold? Lots of things, things I hope I can achieve which in turn will face a lot of fears;
• I want time off - I work 5-6 days a week on my blog and channel due to the hours that fit me best, but I want to utilise my time better so I can fully switch off on weekends. I’ve felt so tired recently (thanks Storm Gertrude) that I just want days to sit, be still, do things I don’t let myself do - such as read books and watch Oscar nominated films from the last three years, oops.
• I want to book some holidays - some, implying to leave the country or area more than once; I’d like to go on some cultural Europe and USA trips, a beach holiday, Japan because of my recent interest in the culture and *dream* the Maldives for a once-in-a-lifetime relaxation. Expensive relaxation be it that. The thing is, I can see myself on holiday, but I fear the process of commitment to dates and booking the whole thing, I’ve never done it before and I’m hoping to overcome that.
• I want change - be it my hair, my body, my work or my lifestyle, I need some changes. I want to be more social, more interactive, more creative so I’m hoping February brings lunches in London, trips to exhibitions, photography bookings and meeting new people who need to teach me valuable lessons.
• One thing I wrote was ‘talk about science’ and to be honest, I never got or enjoyed scene but I do like Doctor Who so maybe I could learn about protons with David Tennant.
The thing is, posts change and people change, and I know each month my priorities and desires will change depending on what I achieve the month prior, so it’s only fair that when you discover growth you discuss growth. And I want you to grow with me, just as I grow in February.
How do you feel about growth? Do you set yourself monthly goals? What do you hope to achieve in February?
Lots of Love,
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